Thursday, 10 August 2017

5 things Bookworms never want to hear


As bookworms, we often have to face a Cruel World that does not understand or appreciate books. Or worse, family members or friends who do not understand why it's necessary to give up your floor to make space for books, or why it's absolutely essential to spend your hard earned money on books, instead of clothes. Because why the heck would you mind being naked if you owned 10,000 books?  
*sighs*   

I've made a list of some of the things bookworms are sick of hearing - things that either make us want to scream, shout, or disappear into our bedrooms for the rest of our lives. And I've included some responses to those statements, so you're hypothetically ready to answer when next faced with them. 

Disclaimer: I'd say don't try this at home or in real life, because my responses may or may not but probably aren't that effective. Consider yourself warned.    

Obviously, this list can't cover every infuriating, insulting, or downright terrifying thing that's been said to us, so please share your own points in the comments! 
     



Very rarely is the movie better than the book, and anyway, it's still an insult. A movie can never dig as deep as a book can, and besides, a book makes you use your imagination. 

So the reasons are educational, really. 

Response: "It wasn't." (Cue for lengthy discussion of book, and it's also good time to pull out the notes you've been taking: comparing the book and movie and analysing why the book's superior).  




Hello? They are literally my kids. Would you sell or give away your kids? Nope. 
(FYI: If I was going to get rid of my currently nonexistent kids, selling would at least have some advantages: money. #sarcasm). 


Response: "Who are you to question my life choices?" Then I suggest you keep an eye on your bookshelves because the person who asked you that question might take it upon themselves to get rid of your books.
Booby traps could work too.  



This isn't a big one, but heaven forbid we should be asked to take our babies into nature and expose them to the elements. Not to mention our own discomfort. 
An ant might crawl up your leg, or you might sit on a mole hill that collapses under you, or it might start raining and the book will get ruined, or......- shock and horror - a dreaded breeze might manipulate your pages so they flap over faster than you can read them. 

Besides, I can never get comfortable outside.  I am not sitting on the grass and I'm certainly not sitting on a garden chair that hasn't been used for a million years and is now crumbling and tattered and dusty from the elements. 
And also insects. YUCK.

I'm quite happy in my bed inside my house.  Also, #introvertproblems - what if a neighbour sees you? 

Response: "If there's an earthquake I have a better chance of surviving (and so has my book - but don't say that) if I'm in a building. And you wouldn't want me to die, would you."  
If they hesitant answering, then think on your feet.  



Acute observation: How uncomfortable must she be reading like that? My back would die if I sat in that position.  


I love my friends. I do. But they do not know how to treat books, and it's literally impossible to refuse them when they ask - ever so sweetly - if they can borrow one of my books. And I know how they feel! I know what it's like to want to read a book so desperately and yet not be able to get your hands on it!

But PAIN. They leave massive creases in the spines and splay the books open at horrible angles. And you can't confront them, cause they take offensive. 
ARRRRGGGHH.

Response: "I don't have any books" or "I sold all my books" or "my other friend is borrowing them". 

FYI: These responses are called lies, and are technically wrong, but desperate situations call for desperate measures.
      


Just.....insulting. Your days are busy, when else are you supposed to read? And is it your fault for reading an incredibly addictive book? Obviously not. No non-bookworm can understand how you just have to keep reading; no matter the hour.  It's not exactly a conscious choice.  


Response: "Take it up with the author who wrote the darling addictive story and literally forced me to keep turning the pages." 
Note to self: Take comfort in the fact that you can sleep when you're dead. 
Coffee also helps. 



Hope you enjoyed this post! Can you relate to any of the points I've mentioned? 

What are some other things that you - as a bookworm - can't bear to hear? 

30 comments:

  1. This post is fantastic, Amy!! I can relate to all of these, especially the "You've Got a Lot of Books." My parents are constantly on my case about giving some away since all my books currently take up 6 book cases, but parting with them is the hardest thing ever. It IS like giving a child away (not that I've ever experienced that but still lol). As to the going outside to read - I'm always convicting myself that going outside is the greatest idea ever and then I get outside and realize how hot and buggy it is and I'm unimpressed. Plus the last time I tried to read outside, I fell overt my lawn chair like the true klutz I am...so never again lol

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    1. Thanks so much, Lauren!
      Haha I feel you - that's annoying! And totally, outside is always uncomfortable :(
      Lol, I can imagine that scarred you for life! Haha ;)
      Thanks for the comment :)

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  2. My husband often makes comments that I have a lot of books - but he has learned to stop there and not say anything negative or make suggestions! He has a hobby that he spends money on and takes up a lot of room, so he really can't talk about my books! Fun post, Amy!

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    1. Lol, it seems like you've trained him well!! Haha :)
      Thanks Angela!

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  3. Haha, I can totally relate to the book borrowing one. Just recently my little cousin, who can be a little destructive, asked me th other day to borrow my Harry Potter books. I had to politely turn her down. My HP books do not leave me house haha!

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    1. Oh dear, close call! At least you could actually say no and she accepted it! I'm not sure if my friends would be so accepting......

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  4. OMG. The number of books I got back from "friends" completely destroyed with corners and whatnot. UGH! However, I do like to read outside! Anything else, I fully relate to! Great post!

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    1. YES!!! It's just awful, isn't it?! Shame!!
      Good for you! I'm glad you're brave, haha ;)
      Thanks Olivia!

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  5. I love this post Amy! I always tell little white lies when someone wants to borrow a book. I only lend them out to one friend, and even then I get a bit anxious! Also, that girl must be so uncomfortable! I don't mind reading out on my deck in the backyard, but sitting on a rock with straight posture? No way! :D I'm looking forward to when I have my one place and my parents aren't complaining about how many books I have!

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    1. Thanks so much, Genni!
      Lol, I feel you :) And yes! That position is so awkward!! Ugh!
      Ah yes!! Me too!

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  6. I absolutely relate to the whole lying thing so we don't have to lend our books :P I always say my friend or my cousin has the book. And omg give away my books?? I've been collecting them so diligently and I should give them away? THAT'S MADNESS!!! Great post Amy :)

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    1. Haha nice ;)
      IT IS!! Sacrilege!!
      Thanks Uma :)

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  7. 'Can I borrow this book Chuckles?' NO NEVER! THEY ARE MINE, BUY YOUR OWN YOU CHEAPSKATES! And anyone who asks me to get rid of them is dicing with death y'know? I NEED them all and they are my precciioouuss...*strokes covers lovingly*. A few times the film has been better than the book and I'm hoping that is true of a few upcoming ones. Of course we need to stay up late reading or we'd never get them done!NO to reading outside with all the noise, spiders and flying beasties...Great post!

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    1. Hahahaha YES!!!
      Yeah, the film is occasionally better the book. And same :)
      Right?! And exactly!! UGH NATURE.
      Thanks!

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  8. Ugh, outside is just the worst lol. Luckily I don't have people asking to borrow my books though because nope, no way I'd let them, haha. To be fair though, sometimes the movie IS better than the book? Except people are only allowed to make that claim if they have in fact read the book. And maybe if they're actually a bookworm since if that's the only book they've read all year, their claim isn't going to hold any weight.

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    1. It is :(
      Ooooh you're lucky!
      Yeah definitely - the film sometimes is much better (for example, The Devil Wears Prada).
      Yes very true. Good point.

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  9. HAHA YES TO ALL OF THIS. People have also said to me so many times "Don't bother reading the book, just watch the movie" and I can't even with that. Like, I JUST LOST A BRAIN CELL LISTENING TO YOU. Why would I ever watch the movie instead of reading the book when the book is a) 100 times better and b) pretty to photograph and c) in depth and thought-provoking?!

    My parents moan about all my books too and I'm like THEY'RE NOT HURTING ANYBODY SHHH.

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    1. I know hey!!! GOSH.
      And exactly!!! Movies are not as nice to photograph.

      Totally!! Poor little innocents <3

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    1. Thanks so much, Erica, I'm so glad!

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  11. LOL I love the responses to "can I borrow this book." Especially, my other friend is borrowing them. Like, all of them. Ha! Great post, Amy.

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  12. All of these, I hate hearing them. I very rarely let anyone borrow my books because they always, ALWAYS, come back damaged. So only if you're in my circle of trust can you borrow my books, and even then I'll be on the person's case about the care of my book and when exactly I'll be getting it back.

    Thanks for sharing,
    Brittany @ Brittany's Book Rambles

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    1. High five :)
      So true! Good for you.

      Thanks for the comment, Brittany :)

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  13. hahahaha!! Yes, to all of these! I've heard them all at least once. It drives me nuts. I stopped loaning out my books because I either never get them back or I get them back damaged. rude! Great post!

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    1. Good plan, I'm so glad you can be strict about that! I fear I'm too soft :(
      Thanks Julie :)

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  14. "Can I borrow this book?" UGH YES. Even with my husband hahaha. He wants to read my B&N edition of LOTR and I always cringe when he asks because I'm so scared he'll ruin the covers. Then his friend asked to borrow this old edition of Ivanhoe and it took me bugging my husband to ask him for it back to finally get it back...6 months later. I don't like people touching my books hahah

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    1. Haha yikes!! Well at least you can be honest with him, right? It's harder with friends! But yikes - six months 😱
      Haha agreed :)

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  15. Great post Amy! And so true. Thankfully I come from a family of bookworms so they are very understanding of my ever growing collection without ever throwing/ giving away any books. I have also got my mum trained to treat my books with the upmost respect so she is allowed to borrow them but no else! Reading outside, is a hard one I always feel as though I should go out and enjoy the sunshine when it graces Scotland for a week or so a year. But I hate bugs and get sunburn, and oh my gosh why are garden chairs so uncomfortable?! So yes reading outside is a rarity :)

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    1. Thanks Deborah!
      Ahhh you are so lucky - that must make a big difference!
      Yeah true! Ugh! It is.
      Thank you for the lovely comment :)

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